You don’t need a dumbphone, you need a new number

Is your phone number really yours, or has it become a relic of past lives and forgotten conversations?

“Oh, someone’s going off the grid, huh” says the Vodafone employee, eyebrows slightly raised, as I inform him at a store in Berlin-Tempelhof that I do not wish to keep my old number. Something about his tone suggests mild bewilderment.

What tf happened to this woman? I can almost see the question marks forming on his forehead as I purchase my new mobile identity, feeling an odd sense of relief as I glance at the digits I’ll now recite whenever someone asks for my number.